Things I’m still learning… (part 3)

And now, on Day three… the hard part. You’ve collected people. You’ve put them in groups. Now, ACT on those groups.

 

For the coworker who is generally a negative person and should have minimal control over the way you do your job… STOP MAKING EXCUSES TO THEM about why you do or can’t do something.

 

For the boss who butts into your home life— STOP TELLING THEM ABOUT IT!

 

For the husband who has to put up with you in a bad mood when you get home- TELL HIM EVERYTHING! Or, at least, everything he’ll listen to.

 

 

Now, a few pieces of life advice:

1- Don’t raise your voice. I mean it. Stop yelling. People stop listening when you start yelling, so you’re not really doing anyone any good.

2- For everything negative thing in your day, find a positive one. Sometimes these are much smaller than the impression you get from the negative ones, but never write a negative without a positive next to it.

3- Don’t take things out on people who aren’t responsible for the problem. It’s not your husband’s fault your coworker picked a fight with you at work, so stop arguing with him about it. Tell him, sure. Vent if he’ll let you. Just keep in mind that he has no control over it, so the best thing he’s going to be able to do is listen and commiserate. Oh, and pour you a glass of wine and massage your feet. Let me know if that last part happens for you, because it really doesn’t for me. 😉

4- Let it go. That’s right. That accident that made you ten minutes late to work this morning? Let it go. It’s out of your control and there’s nothing you can do about it.  (we’ll work through this one next. I know it’s not easy.)

5- Start your day with the goal of being happy at the end of it. All day long, work towards that goal and stop letting people who shouldn’t control that have any effect on it. It’s one of those things that sounds so simple and you have to truly think about it every time you feel yourself getting angry, but I promise, once you get into this habit, it’ll be yours for life!

 

So, there you go! I hope this plan has helped you and I want to hear how you’re working through it! This is the plan I’m working on following this week, since Heaven knows I’m not all that great at it, yet. Feel free to share your progress! Sometimes writing about it helps! That’s just about the whole purpose of this blog, after all! 😉

June 25th- lots of stuff going on today

There are a lot of things I wanted to blog about today. They are all steps in me finding the way to de-stressing, some I am borrowing from Cerra Advocates (great place, can’t point you there, enough!) and others I am incorporating into my entry because they are grounding.

So, let’s start with Day 2 of the Grounded series of e-mails at Cerra Advocates. The key to today’s exercises are finding the thoughts that help you feel grounded (ie, peaceful, confident). The blog states that this is a different thing for different people. For some it’s a place, for others it’s a person. For some its a memory, for others it’s an activity.

A) What makes you feel grounded? Reading a book with no distractions, curled up in my favorite chair with a cup of hot tea (Tension Tamer by Celestial Seasonings being my favorite) or home made hot chocolate (that’s more really warm than actually hot and has a healthy dash of peppermint syrup in it).  I’m complicated, I know.

B) Close your eyes and breathe slowly for three minutes, imagine yourself in the setting you chose for your grounded space.

C) Art Journal Entry for today– illustrate what makes you feel grounded. See how many senses you can wrap into your entry today so that whoever sees it (whether it is just you or if you actually show your journal to anyone) is transported into your grounded space.

Something else that makes me feel more in control of things is organizing my schedules. Today, I have finished my grocery shopping and couponing, (saved almost $92 today!) and planned my menus for the week. I was lucky enough a few years ago that during my “welcome to teaching” seminar for Chatham County, the put us through a full day training with Weber Associates for Time Management. I highly recommend that, too, btw. We received binders and all of the fillers, which was AWESOME! You can even buy the refills for a decent price, if you compare it to a similar set (or collection of sets) at the local office supply store. I have combined this with my control journal from Flylady.net (I’m debating buying her inserts to add to these, you know, some day when I can afford to buy them all!) and have turned my 1 to 31’s into my daily routine checklists (that’s what a to do list is, right?). Filling these out for the week really helps me get an idea of what my week will be like so I can make appointments and stay on schedule.

That probably doesn’t sound very de-stressed to you, but I’m a typical A-personality,J on the Meyer’s Briggs Scale. I’m only happy when I’ve thoroughly planned everything. Makes me a good teacher, too, so who am I to complain? 😉

Organizing

So, I have a lot going on and I need to spend quite a bit of time getting it organized because it’s driving me crazy!

*My house is a wreck (small children tend to have that effect, especially when coupled with emptying a classroom of 6 years’ worth of stuff)

*I am VERY stressed, even though it’s summer break and I really don’t have a reason to be (ok, aside from the ‘house is a wreck’ part

*I have people coming over in a few days to celebrate the end of the year. YIKES!

I have found a few things to help out, but they, too, need to be organized so they fit into my day. Ah, the joy.

First up is my art journal, which I have already started. I have found that concentrating on what I’m doing in that book helps with the stress level a little. I’ll keep posting topics and ideas so you can play along, too. 🙂

I found a few really great websites (and a few apps to go with them!) that should be really good at helping out.
*www.flylady.net <– so far, I’m loving her 15 minute cracks at controlling the mess. I have to do a full on scrub of my house this week, which should make the 15 minutes a lot easier to keep up with in the future! There are also a lot of other things on this site that I am loving. If you haven’t already, stop in and check it out!

*www.cerra.com<– this one has already helped me stay focused quite a bit during the last month of school when I needed it most. You can sign up for their daily e-mails with focus points to help you control the stress in your life. I finished the first one: grounded and went back to do it again, since I wasn’t committed to it. It’s absolutely worth the daily e-mail and I’m not a big fan of filling my inbox with stuff.

 

So, there we go. There’s the start to my organizing. I organize the same way I clean a room, throw everything in the middle and dust it off before you put it back where it’s supposed to go. This isn’t quite everything I need to throw in the middle, but the kitchen is glaring at me and I’ve managed to put off walking in there quite long enough. Time to tackle the mess.

 

 

If I’m not back in a week, forward my mail. 😉